Marina knew perfectly well how much her mother had been looking forward to her sixtieth birthday. Lyudmila Pavlovna had started making a list back in winter of everyone she absolutely wanted to see at the celebration: her sister and brother-in-law, several former colleagues, her neighbor Tamara, and two old university friends. In the end, the guest list came to more than twenty people, and the birthday woman had no desire to squeeze such a crowd into her small apartment.
“I just want to celebrate properly for once,” her mother admitted. “Without spending the whole evening running back and forth between the kitchen and the table, and then standing at the sink until late at night with a mountain of dirty dishes.”
“Then rent a café.”
“And how am I supposed to pay for it? With my pension?”
Marina decided not to argue any further. She earned a good salary at a trading company, lived alone, and had no serious financial obligations, so she could afford to give her mother a generous present. That same evening, she looked through several suitable venues and offered to cover the cost of the birthday banquet herself.
“Just don’t turn it into some enormous feast for fifty people. Twenty-five guests at most.”
Lyudmila Pavlovna’s eyes even filled with tears from surprise.
“Marish, I never expected anything like that. Honestly, I didn’t need you to do something so expensive for me.”
In the end, the restaurant for the anniversary birthday cost Marina 112,000 rubles. Another 15,000 went toward the birthday cake and flowers. The expenses were substantial, but Marina did not regret the money. Her mother was glowing with happiness, the guests loved everything, and Marina was certain she had given someone close to her a worthy gift and that the matter ended there.
However, just one month later, it turned out that Lyudmila Pavlovna had interpreted her daughter’s generous gesture very differently.
“If the birthday went so well, then we’ll celebrate the wedding anniversary too.”
One Saturday, Marina stopped by her parents’ home after work. Her father was repairing something near the kitchen faucet, while Lyudmila Pavlovna immediately invited her daughter to sit down and placed an open box of chocolates in front of her.
“We have some news, by the way. In November, it’ll be thirty-five years since our wedding.”
“I remember.”
“So your father and I decided to celebrate our anniversary.”
Marina smiled.
“That’s good. Go somewhere together and enjoy a quiet evening.”
Lyudmila Pavlovna looked at her daughter as though she had heard something completely unexpected.
“Why would we go alone? We’re inviting guests.”
“What guests?”
“Relatives, of course. We’ll invite the Petrovs, Aunt Zina, the Kovalyovs. I think there’ll easily be eighteen people.”
Now Marina understood perfectly well where her mother was going with this.
“Mom, if you want to organize a celebration, then go ahead.”
“That’s exactly why I’m talking to you. The café needs to be booked in advance. I liked the place where we celebrated my birthday.”
“Then book it.”
Lyudmila Pavlovna fell silent for several seconds, waiting for Marina to continue. When she didn’t, her mother frowned slightly.
“Marina, why do I have to drag every word out of you? I thought you were going to pay for everything.”
“And why am I supposed to pay for it?”
Her mother actually leaned back in her chair, so surprised was she by the question.
“Who paid for my birthday?”
“I did. Because the banquet was my gift to you for your sixtieth birthday.”
“Exactly. And now your father and I have our wedding anniversary.”
For several moments, Marina silently stared at her mother, trying to understand whether she was serious or joking.
“Mom, what does one event have to do with the other?”
“Everything. Last time, everything turned out wonderfully. So why should we squeeze around an ordinary table at home now?”
“Because I’m not paying for another banquet.”
Lyudmila Pavlovna immediately pursed her lips in displeasure.
“I see. You could have said that right away.”
“That’s exactly what I just said.”
At that moment, Marina’s father entered the kitchen. From his expression, Marina immediately realized that he had already heard about his wife’s plans.
“What happened?” Viktor Andreyevich asked.
“Nothing special,” Lyudmila Pavlovna replied dryly. “I suggested celebrating our anniversary. Apparently, I’m asking for too much.”
It turned out her father had never planned any banquet at all.
Marina prepared herself for him to take her mother’s side, but Viktor Andreyevich merely frowned in confusion.
“Why did you decide we absolutely need a restaurant?”
Lyudmila Pavlovna turned sharply toward her husband.
“We discussed this.”
“We discussed the anniversary. I suggested inviting the children, Zina and Kolya, and having a quiet dinner.”
“So what? Sit around a table with four people?”
“Why four? Marina will come. Dima and Lena will be there too.”
Marina barely managed to keep herself from laughing. It turned out that when her father talked about celebrating the anniversary, he meant an ordinary family evening for eight or ten people. But after her luxurious sixtieth birthday, her mother had somehow decided that the next important date should also be celebrated at a restaurant, and she had already managed to mention it to several acquaintances.
“Wait,” Marina interrupted. “Have you already invited guests?”
“I haven’t called anyone yet. I just asked them not to make plans for that particular weekend in November.”
“And where did you tell them the celebration would be?”
Lyudmila Pavlovna looked away.
“I said most likely at the same place where we celebrated my birthday.”
That was when Marina genuinely became angry.
“So first you told everyone about the café, and only afterward decided to ask whether I agreed to pay for it?”
“Don’t twist everything around. I only warned people in advance.”
“Mom, a dinner for twenty guests is going to cost more than a hundred thousand.”
“There won’t be twenty people.”
“Fine, let’s say eighty thousand. That doesn’t mean I suddenly have eighty thousand rubles lying around.”
Lyudmila Pavlovna immediately reminded her daughter about the quarterly bonus she had recently received. Marina did not bother asking how her mother knew about the money. She had probably mentioned it herself at some point during a conversation.
“I earned that bonus. It isn’t a family fund for paying for celebrations.”
“No one is taking your money by force.”
“Then what exactly are we discussing?”
Lyudmila Pavlovna stood up from the table and started carrying away the cups.
“For some reason, I thought a daughter would actually want to make her parents happy.”
Marina stood up too.
“I already made you happy once. That gift cost me 127,000 rubles.”
Hearing the exact amount, her mother irritably placed a cup into the sink.
“And why do you have to count every little thing now? Did I ask you to order a cake for fifteen thousand?”
The conversation effectively ended there. Marina left her parents’ home earlier than she had intended. That evening, her father called her and asked her not to hold a grudge against her mother.
“She got a little carried away after the birthday. Everyone kept praising the party afterward, and she liked that.”
“Dad, she can celebrate something every month if she wants. I don’t mind. But I’m not going to keep paying for it.”
“I told her exactly the same thing.”
A week later, her mother sent her a banquet menu.
After the unpleasant conversation, Marina had been certain that the subject was finally closed. So on Tuesday, she was rather surprised when her mother sent her a photograph of the menu from another restaurant.
A message followed:
“Look, this place is cheaper per person. And if we don’t order alcohol, it’s actually quite reasonable.”
Marina immediately called her mother.
“Mom, why did you send me this menu?”
“I found another café.”
“But I didn’t ask you to look for one.”
“You said eighty thousand was too expensive. At this place, we could probably manage with around sixty.”
“That’s not what I said. I’m not paying at all.”
“Not at all?”
“Yes. Not at all.”
There was silence on the other end for several seconds.
“Fine,” Lyudmila Pavlovna said coldly. “Then I’ll cancel everything.”
“What exactly are you going to cancel?”
“The guests, of course. What else?”
Marina unexpectedly felt an unpleasant pang of guilt, even though she understood perfectly well that she had never asked her mother to invite anyone.
“Why cancel people? Celebrate at home. Or reserve a small table for the closest relatives.”
“After a birthday celebration like mine, inviting everyone home would look a little undignified.”
That sentence finally made everything clear.
Lyudmila Pavlovna did not simply want to celebrate a family milestone. For several weeks after her sixtieth birthday, her acquaintances had continued talking about the beautiful restaurant, the food, and the festive atmosphere. Now her mother felt embarrassed at the thought of holding the next celebration on a much more modest scale.
“Mom, your sixtieth birthday was a separate, special occasion.”
“And thirty-five years of marriage means nothing to you?”
“It’s an important date for you and Dad. I’m not arguing with that. But why should I be responsible for paying for it?”
“Because you can afford it.”
“Just because I can afford something doesn’t make it my obligation.”
Lyudmila Pavlovna said a brief goodbye and ended the call.
Then Marina’s brother became involved.
Marina’s younger brother, Dmitry, lived in another nearby city and usually preferred to stay away from family disagreements. This time, however, Lyudmila Pavlovna had personally complained to him about what was happening.
That evening, Dmitry called his sister.
“What are you two arguing about now?”
“Mom decided to have a restaurant celebration for the anniversary.”
“Well, if she decided, she decided.”
“Except apparently I’m supposed to pay for it.”
Dmitry gave a surprised whistle.
“Why on earth?”
“Because I paid for her birthday too.”
“Impeccable logic.”
Marina asked whether her brother was prepared to contribute as well. If the anniversary was supposedly so important to the whole family, the expenses could be divided between Marina, Dmitry, and their parents.
“I can give twenty thousand without a problem,” he agreed immediately. “But I can’t manage more than that right now.”
The next day, the brother and sister presented their mother with a compromise. Dmitry would contribute twenty thousand, Marina another twenty thousand, and their parents would cover the rest themselves. With forty or fifty thousand, they could easily gather the closest relatives around one table without organizing a large banquet.
But Lyudmila Pavlovna was not particularly enthusiastic about the idea.
“So for my sixtieth birthday you found 120,000, but for your father’s and my anniversary there’s only forty?”
“Mom,” Marina replied patiently, “that time I gave you a banquet worth 112,000 as a gift. I did not sign up for a lifetime subscription to paying for all your future celebrations.”
“You don’t need to speak to me in that tone.”
“How else am I supposed to explain it? You’re treating my gift as though I established an amount that I’m now required to give you every year.”
Viktor Andreyevich was the first to intervene again.
“Lyuda, enough. The children are giving forty thousand. We’ll add the rest. We’ll have a nice family celebration.”
He paused for a moment and added:
“Although personally, I never asked the children for money for our anniversary in the first place.”
After that, Lyudmila Pavlovna somehow managed to become offended with her husband, her son, and her daughter all at once.
In the end, however, the anniversary was celebrated.
There were about three weeks left before the chosen date. For several days, Marina’s mother barely contacted her, but gradually their relationship returned to normal. Lyudmila Pavlovna did not bring up the restaurant again.
In the end, Marina’s parents reserved a small private room in a cozy family restaurant near their home. Twelve people attended: their children, Lyudmila Pavlovna’s sister and her husband, and two other married couples who had been friends with the family for many years.
As promised, Marina and Dmitry each contributed twenty thousand. Their parents added about another thirty thousand. The celebration was noticeably more modest than the sixtieth birthday party, but judging by everyone’s reactions, no one except Lyudmila Pavlovna herself noticed much difference.
About halfway through the evening, Aunt Zina raised her glass and said:
“Lyudochka, the most important thing is that all the people closest to you are here today. Some people throw such enormous anniversary parties nowadays that you’d think they were getting married all over again.”
Marina involuntarily glanced at her mother. Lyudmila Pavlovna met her daughter’s eyes but said nothing.
After the guests had left, her mother finally approached Marina.
“You know, it turned out pretty well.”
“It was very nice.”
“Although the hall at that other restaurant was prettier, of course.”
Marina smirked.
“Mom, don’t start again.”
“All right, all right. I’m quiet.”
They both laughed, although the former ease between them had not yet completely returned.
After the anniversary, their relationship gradually improved. Lyudmila Pavlovna no longer asked her daughter to pay for family celebrations, although she occasionally mentioned her sixtieth birthday. She especially enjoyed telling acquaintances about the wonderful restaurant celebration Marina had once organized for her.
Marina had learned something from the experience as well. For her mother’s next birthday, she chose a specific present in advance and immediately warned her that she would stop by in the evening with flowers and a cake.
This time, Lyudmila Pavlovna did not ask for anything extra.
Of course, the disagreement over the anniversary was never completely forgotten. Her mother still believed Marina could have been more generous. Marina remained convinced that one expensive gift had far too quickly turned into the expectation of another equally expensive gesture.
Eventually, they simply stopped returning to the argument.
Sometimes family disagreements end exactly like that: neither side admits they were wrong, relatives continue communicating, but after one unpleasant conversation, the boundaries and rules become much clearer.