Lena took the baking sheet with the fish pie out of the oven, and a fishy aroma wafted through the kitchen. Everything was just the way her husband, Viktor, liked it. There was fresh borscht on the stove, and the fish pie was on the baking sheet. All that was left was to finish boiling the compote, but that was a quick task she would finish when her husband walked through the door.
She covered the pie with a snow-white towel to keep it warm and walked over to the window. Their house was located in the middle of the block, and right across from them was the bus stop where the bus carrying her husband was about to arrive.
Lena hadn’t seen Viktor for three months. He worked on a rotational schedule in the north—three months there, three months at home. And how eagerly Lena had been waiting for him! Besides, a private house wasn’t like an apartment. It always required a man’s hands.
The house was Lena’s. When she and Viktor got married five years ago, he had an apartment. They thought it would be better to live in a spacious private home, so Viktor sold his apartment. With that money, he tried to start a business, but it didn’t work out. His business failed, and for the last three years, he had been working rotational shifts.
Everything was fine; Viktor brought in decent money, but it was still very hard for twenty-eight-year-old Lena to manage on her own for three months. During that time, she often forgot she was married.
They didn’t have any children. Viktor didn’t want any. Or rather, not that he didn’t want them, but he thought it wasn’t the right time yet.
“I’m going to be away for three months. How will you manage with a child?” he had said. “Let’s earn some money first. I’ll leave the shifts and find work in the city. Then we can think about children.”
But earning more money wasn’t working out. Even though Viktor brought in money, there were always necessary expenses. Now, for instance, the roof had apparently leaked, and in rainy weather, there was an ugly wet spot on the ceiling in one of the bedrooms that scared Lena and forced her to put a basin under it. The basin came in handy whenever it rained. A lot of water collected in it.
Viktor already knew about the problem because they had spoken regularly, and he promised to take care of the roof when he returned. But this was an expensive task, and Lena understood that.
Her husband was a good man—practical, loving. He called her every evening, worried about her. Lena loved her husband. Every time he came back from the shifts, she would take the day off work. She would make all kinds of treats and wait by the window.
Her husband’s plane had landed a couple of hours ago, and now the usual bus that Viktor took to get home was supposed to arrive. There he was! Lena’s heart skipped a beat. She saw her husband carrying a huge travel bag.
Normally, when the bus left, Viktor would wave happily toward his house, knowing his wife was waiting for him at the window. This time, however, things were different. Viktor wasn’t alone. He was carrying a child. It seemed like a boy. A very young one. Lena couldn’t determine the child’s age, as she rarely dealt with children. Viktor looked grim and didn’t wave his hand.
He had his hands full—one with the bag, the other with the child.
Viktor walked toward the pedestrian crossing, and Lena stood frozen, confused. Whose child was that? Someone from work? But why was Viktor bringing the boy to their home? And who could have entrusted such a small child to Viktor, who knew nothing about children?
Viktor entered the house, casually dropped his bag, and gently set the boy down on the floor. The child clung to his legs, looking up at Lena with wide eyes, sucking his finger. It was clear the boy was lost, just like Lena. She didn’t rush to greet her husband as usual. She froze in the hallway.
“Well, Lena, aren’t you going to kiss your husband after such a long time apart?” Viktor stretched out his arms toward her.
But there wasn’t a trace of cheerfulness on his face or in his eyes. Trying not to disturb the boy, Lena embraced her husband and even kissed him back. But she couldn’t wait to ask:
“Viktor, whose child is this? What’s going on?”
Viktor sighed heavily, pulled his wife aside, and took the boy’s hand.
“Tolik, let’s go. I’ll show you something. Let’s take off your shoes and go to the room.”
Viktor led the boy to the bedroom, sat him on the bed, and handed him a model airplane, something Viktor usually cherished and even insisted on dusting carefully. From this alone, Lena realized that something serious had happened.
“You stay here for now. Aunt Lena and I need to talk,” Viktor said.
He closed the bedroom door.
“Will you feed me, wife?” he smiled faintly.
“Of course, let’s go,” Lena said, startled.
She poured hot borscht for her husband, sliced the fish pie, and sat down at the table opposite him, anxiously waiting for him to speak.
Viktor ate his borscht without looking up. It was clear that he didn’t know how to start the conversation.
“This is my son,” he suddenly blurted out. “This boy is my son!”
Lena gasped quietly, and her heart began to race. More than anything in the world, she wanted Viktor to smile and tell her that he was just playing a prank on her. But there was no smile on Viktor’s face.
“It happened, Lena!” he grabbed her hand with intensity. “You understand, three months is a long time for a man. I got involved with the cook there. It only happened a couple of times, and she got pregnant.”
“So?!” Lena jerked her hand away from him. “You told me it was too early for children, and now you have a son?”
Her voice trembled with barely contained pain, threatening to turn into a scream.
“Do you think I wanted this to happen?” Viktor continued to justify himself. “She didn’t tell me she was pregnant. She gave birth and just dropped the bomb on me. But there’s no doubt that this boy is mine. And he looks like me. Didn’t you notice?”
No, Lena hadn’t noticed any resemblance. She hadn’t had time to study the boy, and now, in that moment, the child disgusted her. He was like a living proof of her husband’s infidelity. And there was still something in the situation Lena couldn’t understand.
“Why did you bring him here?” she asked. “Where’s his mother?”
“Well, here’s the thing, she’s not around anymore. A bear killed her. She stayed late at the canteen, then took a longer route. The bear was a wounded one. It went completely wild. They shot it later, but what’s the use? The boy’s mother is gone. I was officially listed as his father. What was I supposed to do? So I had to bring Tolik home.”
“And now?” Lena whispered faintly.
“I don’t know… Whatever you decide… If you throw us out, we’ll leave. Just know, I’ve always loved only you. This affair with the cook was a one-time thing. It’s hard for a man to be alone for so long, I couldn’t hold back. I cheated on you once, but I swear it will never happen again if you forgive me. I’ll be faithful to you till the grave.”
Lena looked at her husband, and despite how bad she felt, she saw that he was genuinely remorseful. She had long since gotten used to his arrivals and the waiting, and couldn’t imagine her life any other way. Yes, she would forgive him, but what about the boy?
“And what about the child?” she whispered, her voice still quiet. “What do you plan to do with him?”
“Lena, what am I supposed to do with my son now?” the man spread his hands. “If you don’t forgive me, we’ll leave together. If you do forgive me, you’ll have to accept him too.”
And this was much more complicated. Almost impossible! How could she accept her beloved’s child from another woman? Viktor would have to care for a constant reminder of what he had with someone else!
Lena stood up silently and left the house just as quietly. She needed to be alone. She wandered the streets aimlessly until late at night. Her head burned with heat, and her thoughts swarmed in every direction. She even had the urge to throw herself off a bridge when she reached the river. But that was nonsense, and deep down, Lena already knew what she would do. She couldn’t imagine her life without her husband. She would have to come to terms with the boy and get used to him.
Lena returned home late that night. Viktor had long been asleep in their marital bed, and the strange boy lay on the unfolded armchair. A nightlight glowed on the nightstand, and in its dim light, Lena approached the armchair, trying to get a better look at the child. He was thin, pale, and slept restlessly, jerking his body. This poor little thing had suffered so much. He had lost his mother not long ago. Lena tried to feel sympathy for him, but it didn’t come. Only disdain rose within her.
Tolik was two years old. The boy was shy and unusually quiet. Lena tried not to show her negative feelings toward him. However, the little one somehow sensed them with his child’s intuition and tried not to get close to Lena. He always clung to Viktor, but even he didn’t seem to show much tenderness toward the boy. He did what was necessary, nothing more. He bathed him, fed him, bought him toys, probably more to keep Tolik occupied and away from him.
For the first week, Lena didn’t speak to either her husband or Tolik.
She wandered around the house like a shadow, her eyes constantly landing on the unpleasant little person.
At first, Viktor was cautious, trying to please Lena, but once he realized that she hadn’t kicked him out, meaning she was ready to forgive him, he started behaving like usual. He got involved with the roof and ceiling repairs, and these everyday tasks forced the couple to communicate. At first, Lena replied monosyllabically, but by the end of the first month, she had almost thawed and, to her shame, forgave him. But she still couldn’t bear to see the child! Let Viktor deal with him.
After two months, Lena began to feel anxious. Viktor was about to leave for work. She wondered what he planned to do with the boy. When Lena asked, Viktor raised his eyebrows in confusion.
“Lena, I can’t take him to work with me, can I? Where do you want me to leave him, in the trailer? Of course, he’ll stay here. I’ve already arranged a spot for him at the daycare. Only formalities are left. You’ll drop him off in the mornings and pick him up in the evenings.” Seeing the disbelief on his wife’s face, Viktor hastened to continue.
“I’m not asking you to love him. I see that’s impossible for you. You’ll pick him up from daycare, feed him, and let him play with his toys. Tolik is quite independent. He won’t cause any trouble.”
“Independent” Tolik, blinking his big light eyes, peeked out of the room, and Lena realized he had heard everything. But what could he have understood? What can a two-year-old comprehend?
Apparently, the two-year-old understood more than Lena thought. After Viktor left for work, he became completely withdrawn. Every morning, the boy dressed for daycare on his own, not asking Aunt Lena for anything. She silently took him there, silently picked him up, and silently fed him dinner.
Until one day, after daycare, Tolik pushed his plate away and mumbled that he didn’t want to eat, then went to the room designated for him. It was quiet in the room, and the door was open. From time to time, Lena passed by and glanced inside. The boy wasn’t playing with his toy train, wasn’t building anything with blocks. He lay quietly on the sofa with his eyes closed. At first, Lena thought Tolik was just tired, but the next time she passed by the open door, she noticed that his face was bright red.
Tolik was fair-skinned, pale, and the redness stood out to Lena.
Reluctantly, she entered the room and almost disgustedly reached for his forehead. She hadn’t even touched him when she felt the heat radiating from his forehead. Lena panicked, grabbed the boy by the shoulders, and shook him. Tolik didn’t wake up for a long time, and when he opened his eyes, they were clouded. The child was limp, sluggish.
“Tolik, what’s wrong? Are you sick?” Lena crouched in front of the sofa. “Do you feel bad? How long have you been feeling sick?”
“A long time. It’s been hurting here and here,” the boy pointed to his head and throat. “Yesterday, I threw up at daycare.”
Tolik spoke unclearly, and it seemed like he was about to lose consciousness. Quickly rushing to the medicine cabinet, Lena took his temperature and, without waiting for the thermometer’s reading, called for an ambulance. It was clear enough already. The child was burning with fever.
The ambulance took a long time to arrive. In that time, Lena saw the terrifying number 40 on the thermometer, and Tolik slipped back into unconsciousness. Lena gave him fever medicine and ran to the windows, waiting for the ambulance. She had bitten her lips until they bled.
“Tolik, Tolik, how could you? You’ve been sick for so long and didn’t say anything, didn’t complain. You endured because you’re afraid of that terrible aunt who hates you. You’re such a quiet, such a good boy! What did you do to make me dislike you?”
“Oh, mom, we’ll have to hospitalize him, he’s wheezing,” the paramedic frowned after listening to Tolik.
Lena rushed to cover the boy, took him in her arms, and ran to the ambulance.
In the hospital, she explained for a long time who the child was.
“This is my husband’s son, and I’m in the process of adopting him. Very soon, I’ll be his mother.”
Having said that, Lena was about to lie, but suddenly realized that she truly intended to do that. In one evening, the thick crust of ice that had covered her heart melted. It melted without a trace from the warmth of those little hands that wrapped around her neck as she carried Tolik to the ambulance.
They stayed in the hospital for two weeks, and Lena was probably the most anxious mother in the ward. She checked his temperature almost every hour and made the entire medical staff jump when it didn’t drop. Her reward was Tolik’s delighted eyes and his little hands when he reached out to his “new” Aunt Lena.
The boy called her “mom” later, after Viktor returned from work. It happened so naturally, but Lena cried all night afterward. By that time, she had officially adopted Tolik and had made herself his mother. Now she knew that this boy was her son not only on paper but also in her heart.
A year and a half passed, and Tolik was unrecognizable. Now he was a cheerful, quite active boy, who adored his new mother. He never left Lena’s side, completely losing interest in his father. Viktor didn’t mind, and he sighed in relief.
Then something terrible happened. Viktor left for work, and soon Lena received news that the bus carrying workers had fallen into a ravine. It rolled several times, and then it was covered with snow, so some bodies were never found. Among them was Lena’s husband.
Lena almost went mad with grief. She loved her husband, and only her son saved her from overwhelming sorrow. How lucky she was not to be alone, to have Tolik now! Lena lived only for him.
A year later, Viktor was officially declared missing, and after two years, they would declare him dead. By then, Lena had already come to terms with the loss of her husband. Two weeks before he was officially declared dead, Viktor appeared.
It happened in the spring, on a rainy day. After coming back from a walk with Tolik, Lena didn’t notice the door was unlocked. What concerned her more at that moment was whether Tolik’s feet had gotten wet. She took off the boy’s shoes in the hallway and checked his socks. Satisfied, she told him to run to his room and change.
“I’ll make tea, and we’ll have some hot tea,” she said cheerfully as she entered the kitchen.
The last words died on her lips. At the table, as if nothing had happened, sat her husband, eating the pie Lena had baked in the morning.
“Don’t be scared, Lenok, I’m alive,” Viktor winked at her. “Don’t be so scared, I’m telling you,” Viktor jumped up from the table when he saw Lena about to faint. “I wasn’t on that bus, I wasn’t.”
“Where have you been for two whole years?” Lena whispered as she sank onto a stool.
“I lived with a woman. I was about to go to work, really, and I had almost gotten on that damned bus. But an old acquaintance called me and invited me to the south. She decided to buy property there. She’s wealthy, you know. A little older than me, but that doesn’t matter.”
Later, while in the south, he heard about the bus and decided – it must be fate. For you, I’ll be dead, but I’ll stay alive with her.
“You… you… bastard!” Lena muttered, unable to speak clearly. “Do you have any idea what I’ve been through because of you? Why did you come back now?”
“The thing is, Lenok, we’ve got a business together now, and all that. Anyway, this woman and I decided to formalize our relationship. I came for a divorce and for Tolik.”
“What? What did you say? For Tolik? Why do you need him?”
“I’m telling you, my new partner is older than me. She couldn’t have children, and now she really wants one. We’re getting married, we’ll take Tolik and raise him.”
“Not for anything in the world!” Lena screamed, her voice suddenly cutting through.
Her hands, instinctively groping around the table, grabbed the fork. Viktor became genuinely scared. At that moment, Lena looked completely out of her mind.
“I won’t give you my son, not for anything in this world. You can get married, do whatever you want, but Tolik is my son. Officially mine, by law. You got bored and decided to get yourself a new toy in the form of a boy? And if he doesn’t fit in, then what?”
“Lena, put the fork down,” Viktor glanced at her hand and sighed with relief when Lena opened her fingers and the fork fell with a dull clink onto the table. “Listen, you’re not yourself right now. This is your anger and jealousy talking because I left you for another. But Tolik doesn’t need you, he’s nothing to you.”
“Nothing, you say?” Lena narrowed her eyes. “Then let’s go and ask him who he wants to stay with, with you or with me. He’s already a big boy and can decide for himself.”
Lena didn’t finish speaking before a small figure darted across the kitchen doorframe. Tolik, who had been standing behind the door, heard all the recent words and ran to Lena, who was sitting on the stool. He threw his arms around her as hard as he could and cried:
“Mom, I want to be with you. Don’t give me to him.”
“Of course not, Tolik,” Lena said, sitting the boy on her lap. “You’re my little boy, and I won’t be able to live without you. And you leave, get out,” she shot a furious look at Viktor. “You heard everything! My son wants to live with me. You’ll get your divorce, but forget about my son. I’ll tear you apart if you try to take him from me.”
“Well, screw you!”
Viktor wanted to leave proudly, but Lena’s pie was just too tempting, and he stuffed the leftover pieces into his mouth before getting up.
“Whatever you want, it’s your loss! Now raise someone else’s boy. You won’t have your own because no one will marry you with a kid.”
“I didn’t want to get married again anyway. Another bastard like you will show up,” Lena shouted after Viktor. “Tolik and I are fine together, and you’re a fool.”